The Silent Panic of Feeling Behind

00:00:00: Welcome back to the show.

00:00:01: I'm really glad you are here today.

00:00:04: We need to talk about something incredibly heavy, incredibly quiet and deeply uncomfortable.

00:00:12: If we have a look around your life Look at people around you And felt this sudden sinking realization That everyone else received the instruction manual for life except you.

00:00:28: It's specific kind of late night panic.

00:00:32: You are lying in the bed.

00:00:34: The room is completely dark and this voice whispering your head, what if I never actually make it?

00:00:44: What If This Is

00:00:45: It?,

00:00:48: What If I'm Just Fundamentally Missing The Pieces Required To Build A Successful

00:00:53: Life?,

00:00:56: If you ever felt that recently or if you're feeling it right now as you listen to these...I want you take a deep slow breath Because today, we are going to pull him back the carton on this exactly anxiety.

00:01:13: We're not gonna dress it up in a toxic positivity... ...we're not going give you a fake generic five-step plan to get rich and happy Instead.. ..we'll look at these monsters right into their eyes.

00:01:31: The truth is This feeling of not making it is one the loneliest experience in this world.

00:01:39: It makes you feel like an imposter, a child playing dress up in adult world.

00:01:48: Constantly terrify that someone is going to tap on your shoulder and say... Hey we found you out!

00:01:57: You don't belong here.

00:02:00: But.. Is The Secret I've Realized?

00:02:04: Almost everyone is waiting for that tap on the shoulder.

00:02:08: Let's talk about that imaginary instruction manual, why do we feel like we missed it?

00:02:17: I remember vividly when i first started learning English... ...I would stay up incredibly late into the night.. ..I was staring at page reading and practicing until my eyes burned out And the entire time I was doing it This horrific mental soundtrack was playing on a loop in the background.

00:02:41: I was sitting there late at night, thinking...I am completely wasting my time!

00:02:49: I'm throwing money away from this lesson…I just not good enough for it.

00:02:57: Let me ask you these have ever tried to learn something new or build a new life while carrying that exact weight?

00:03:06: It was killing me.

00:03:08: I would listen to people who were naturally articulated, People who spoke fluently without a second thought... ...I'd brutally compare myself with

00:03:18: them.".

00:03:20: I felt small.

00:03:22: I felt like I was running away where everyone else struck the mile ahead of me wearing runny shoes while i was buried food in the mud.

00:03:33: But looking back now I realized something crucial.

00:03:38: I was comparing my mess, frustrating day one to someone else's Day One Thousand.

00:03:45: We do this with everything don't we?

00:03:49: We look at our mess, chaotic behind the scenes footage The late nights.

00:03:56: They wasted money The frustrating mistake And we compare it To everyone else's foolish edit Perfect highlight reel.

00:04:05: Thinking about that for a second, you are judging your internal worth based on someone else's finished product.

00:04:14: When you do that the definition of making it becomes moving target.

00:04:19: if You think Making It means executing everything flawlessly On The first try...you will never arrive!

00:04:29: The moment you eat a milestone Your brain will automatically move the finish line further away.

00:04:39: That is why you feel, You aren't making it!

00:04:43: It's not because YOU ARE FAILING.

00:04:46: IT IS BECAUSE YOU ARE PLAYING A GAME WHERE THEIR RULES CHANGE EVERY SINGLE DAY AND THE FINISHED LINE DOESN'T ACTUALLY EXIST.

00:04:55: YOU ARE RUNNING A MARATHON ON A TRADE MEAL WONDER WHY THE SCENARIOUS IS NOT CHANGING.

00:05:02: I want to look at this from a different angle.

00:05:06: Let's Look At What Is Actually Happen To Us When We Fall Into This Mental Inspiral.

00:05:12: Most Of The Time, the overwhelming feeling that you are making it in life is not a factual summarize of your abilities.

00:05:20: It is actually just a physiological symptom of exhaustion.

00:05:25: Your brain is hardwired to mistake temporary tiredness for permanent failure When you are burned out, when you're stressed about bills or when have had a strength of bad days your brain goes into survival mode.

00:05:43: It wants to protect from future disappointment.

00:05:48: So To keep yourself safe it starts telling us story.

00:05:53: He says give up now.

00:05:55: Don't try so hard You will never make it anyway.

00:06:00: Why bother?

00:06:02: It is a defense mechanism disguised as harsh truth.

00:06:07: I want you to think back to the time in your life maybe five years ago, or even ten years ago where you felt completely hopeless... A moment when you thought….

00:06:19: I don't know how i'm going through this.

00:06:23: Thinking about that version of you Back then.

00:06:27: That person was terrified But guess what?

00:06:31: You made it through that.

00:06:34: You survived one hundred percent of your worst days!

00:06:38: The version you listen to this podcast right now is the future success story, so why do we refuse to give ourselves credit for our ground?

00:06:57: Why are we so focused on the mountain ahead that we never turn around to look at the massive valley We've already climbed?

00:07:08: As we wrap up today's episode, I want to leave you with a challenge.

00:07:28: power, states or praise.

00:07:32: But what if we decide that making it is actually about preservation?

00:07:38: What if making it simply means preserving your peace of mind?

00:07:43: What If It Means Keeping Your Kindness Intact in a World That Can Be Incredibly Cruel?

00:07:51: What IF IT MEANS Waking up tomorrow morning despite the heavy chest and anxious thoughts and choose to try one more time.

00:08:01: If you survive today, if you took care of yourself... ...if you listen this podcast to try and understand your mind a little better You are making it!

00:08:13: You're doing the work.

00:08:16: The panic you feel is not a sign that you were broken or left behind.

00:08:21: It's just proof that you carry deeply about your life.

00:08:26: It is proof that you have a big heart and big dreams, And You are just tired.

00:08:33: And being tired it's completely allowed!

00:08:36: Its okay to be tired...It doesn't mean you're a failure..it Just means That you need to rest.

00:08:45: So To the person listening right now who feels like they are fishing last Stop running against any imaginary crowd.

00:08:55: You are exactly where you need to be.

00:08:57: The manual doesn't exist!

00:09:00: We're all just making it up as we go.

00:09:05: Thankyou for sitting with me through this uncomfortable truth today.

00:09:09: If this episode brought even a little bit of comfort, please share It With A Friend who might Be Fighting This Exactly Same Silent Battle Right Now Until Next Time.

00:09:22: take care Of Yourself Take Deep Breath And remember, you are doing much better than you think you were.

00:09:31: Gods love You so much!